Wednesday, September 5, 2012

No Fear

Abhaya Mudra (gesture of no fear) with Dana Flynn at Floyd Yoga Jam, Sept 2, 2012.
This moment changed my life, I think.

     When sorrow comes, let us accept it simply, as a part of life. Let the heart be open to pain; let it be stretched by it. All the evidence we have says that this is the better way.

     An open heart never grows bitter. Or if it does, it cannot remain so. In the desolate hour, there is an outcry; a clenching of the hands upon emptiness; a burning pain of bereavement; a weary ache of loss.

     But anguish, like ecstasy, is not forever. There comes a gentleness, a returning quietness, a restoring stillness. This, too, is a door to life. Here, also, is a deepening of meaning-- and it can lead to dedication; a going forward to the triumph of the soul, the conquering of the wilderness. And in the process will come a deepening inward knowledge that in the final reckoning, all is well.
                                                                                   
                                                                                          ~A. Powell Davies

Thursday, May 3, 2012

Expansion

Soooo, this last year or two has really been about challenging my ideas about what and who I am. For a long time (I mean a LONG time), there was this extremely narrow slit of a window that I THOUGHT represented what I could do and was able to devote myself to completely.

At some point that notion began to shift. I've noticed (in retrospect, naturally) that I make my best decisions when I don't overthink. I'm not talking about which color flip flops to buy or whether to buy the $3 dish soap or the $3.99 dish soap or whether to "like" someone's status update. I'm talking about big decisions.

1. Buying our house. Ben and I went to an open house, toured it, didn't talk, went outside, stared each other in the eye, and said, "this is it." Was it perfect? Did it have the granite countertops, the perfect colors, the exact layout, the immaculately landscaped yard? No. That's all stuff we added later, in many many layers, and are still joyfully layering, as finances and time constraints shift. But I have never for one second looked back. We made this decision together, on our intuition alone, and it was the right one from day one.

2. Entering teacher training with Rolf Gates. One weekend (February 20, 2010 or so), a month after completing my 200 hour and sending everything off for Yoga Alliance approval, I was reading Rolf's book, Meditations From the Mat, and on a whim decided to visit his webpage for the first time. I quickly noticed that his 500 hour training had just begun in Virginia Beach, only 100 miles from me. Without a thought, I emailed him, and upon finishing all the required paperwork, was enrolled and entered the program late (I missed one weekend which I made up a year later). This was a life changing time period for me. I was searching for a way to "pull down" and this was it. From Rolf, I learned so many essential elements of living a life on purpose (not WITH purpose, which is an important distinction, I think).

3. Beginning Project Yoga Richmond.

4. Starting Yoga and 12 Step Recovery classes (in progress).

5. Teaching Stand Up Paddleboard Yoga classes here in Richmond.

There's lots more expansiveness happening-- all the time-- just remaining open to it. 

Friday, March 2, 2012

The Hug that Heals

"Muscular energy heals." ~Niki Schemmel, friend, mom, amazing local yoga instructor

Niki said this the other day when I asked her advice about a student of mine. Sometimes, words-- even those casually thrown out there-- have a way of burrowing into my very consciousness. I'm coming to realize that the things/events/themes/situations that pluck my strings, come up frequently, or cause a shift in my perception are the ones the most worthy of examination. So when these words plucked a particular thread for me, I realized this was the summation of an experience I had recently.

I spent weekend before last in Houston, where I attended the Texas Yoga Conference along with several friends (Jeanie, Melissa, Tami, Chrys) I hadn't seen in a long time. I made lots of new friends, one of whom, Jennifer, a yoga teacher trained by Anusara instructors in Houston, was kind enough to put me up in her beautiful home for the 5 days I was there along with several other awesome yoga chicks. At one point she made the statement, "I love to give hugs... I'm a hugger." (She does give fantastic hugs... and even wore a t-shirt that said "FREE HUGS.") Turns out she is a fantastic Acro-Yoga base as well! She is the very definition of love and support and kindness.

I think we often can let ourselves be put off by what we initially see in others... or in situations... and undoubtedly, that can block our growth. I know that there's a part of me that feels threatened by boldness in others. It's like there is a built-in laser beam that hones right in on these qualities and initially, I may shy away from connection because of it. But with Jenn, her realness, intelligence and wit, so sharp indeed that I might otherwise have been put off, immediately gave way to her warm and radiant smile that just drew me in. And then, I was lucky enough to get to learn what an incredible story she has and how almost maddening personal challenges gave birth to this beautiful, amazing soul who gives and gives and gives. She is the very essence of the lotus, opening to beauty from the muddy water.

Her actual story itself, here, doesn't matter (plus it's not mine to tell anyway)... The lesson here is what has stayed with me... This idea that when we allow our defenses to soften, our hard outer edges to relax, we become open to so much beauty.

John Friend has had a rough go of it lately, and I don't mean to opine on his recent legal and moral situation in this post... but the one thing I do want to bring up was this quote, from his workshop in Pennsylvania in November 2010: "If I had only one thing to teach you, one thing to leave with you this weekend, it would be this: Soften the limiting ideas you have about yourself. Open your heart to something more. You are worthy of living this day fully."

I learned a lot about myself that weekend... that I actually love therapeutic basing and flying, Thai massage, and teachers that do seemingly crazy things (putting me up on your feet for a long flight right before the Sean Johnson workshop? thanks Mateo! holding us in Frog for the entire length of Whitney Houston's "I Will Always Love You"? thanks Les! moving from Lunge to Eagle to a "made it up when I was in the shower" pose called OMG to Bird of Paradise? thanks Dana!)

Even if that's not necessarily the teacher I am... I can so appreciate it. It's a little like a vacation from being me for a while, getting out of my own super-grounded, often heavy ways so I can float around for awhile. I can embrace being "whatever" for a while because I know who I am. And maybe, little bits of what I experience will begin to shift and change me, in the most amazing ways.

My weekend in Houston was an exercise in Muscular Energy. Pulling in from all that's around me, drawing it in, to strengthen, lift, bloom, become... heal.

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Vishuddha

"Vishuddha

Sound, Creative identity, oriented to self-expression

This is the chakra located in the throat and is thus related to communication and creativity. Here we experience the world symbolically through vibration, such as the vibration of sound representing language." ~ Anodea Judith


Today represented a milestone of a day for me. Since, oh, 1998 or 1999 I have dreamed of playing the harmonium-- that portable combination accordion/organ used in Kirtan, devotional chanting and mantra. There's something so amazing about the sound of a harmonium-- hearing it alone immediately opens my heart. And even just chanting Om along to a couple of well-placed chords becomes a transformative experience that turns my day around.

Since I received my harmonium on December 1 from Kristin Brooks of the Bhakti House Band, I have played sometimes for two or three hours a day, not actively trying to learn chords or tunes but just delighting in the sound I'm able to make with it-- and how resonant the vocals are on top of it. It's so powerful to me, the sounds reverberate in my mind and in my throat long after I am done actually playing and singing.

There is the feeling that this is a new way of being, and at the age of 38, finding those moments is pretty special to me. There was probably a time in my life when I thought I had seen it all. I'll save my story for another time, but suffice it to say that this year has represented a beautiful shift for me-- from the unreal to the real, the safety of the known to the juicy mystery of the unknown, the darkness to the light. I've been stunned and touched by my students, most recently the ones who allowed me to share my new love of the harmonium with them today. I'll say that the experience of teaching has shifted for me in a big way this year. It's not always been easy-- goodness knows I've found more ways than I care to admit that I have made everything about me-- but there is now a release of all that, a willingness to live in service of something greater, even though I am not sure at this moment what exactly that "something greater" is. In any case, 2012 promises to be more of the same awakening, unfolding, revealing... and I am ready for it, here, now, receptive.


asato ma sad gamaya
tamaso ma jyotir gamaya
mrutyor ma amritam gamaya


From ignorance lead me to truth
From darkness lead me to light
From death lead me to immortality


Brhadaranyaka Upanisad, I.iii.28



Namaste.

I bow to the light that shines within.

Om shanti.

Infinite peace be with you.

Monday, December 12, 2011

Winter Schedule

It's been a while since my last post... time has been at a premium lately as my efforts have been joyfully given to Project Yoga Richmond, a cause with which I am truly grateful to be aligned (check us out!)...

With PYR we're working toward our mission to make yoga accessible to everyone. In 2012 we're expanding our offerings in the community as well as evolving our fee structure to mainly a donation-based system. This is the realization of a dream of mine for sure. I'm so unbelievably lucky to have great alliances and friendships with my team-- J, Michelle, Pam, Wendy, Liz, Natalie, Stacy, Cate, Jenna, Kalyani, Carolyn, Sandy, Amanda, Madeline, and Renee-- as well as countless others who have donated their time and money and energy. There's some great things in the works for PYR including teacher trainings, Acro and Hoop Jams, outdoor classes at parks and museums, and so much community service our impact will be felt far and wide. That's my intention for the coming year for 2012 and now it's just about aligning with that intention.

In the meantime, while I am still teaching a lot of private lessons, here's where you can catch me for group classes (I am keeping my schedule light for a while in order to give myself lots of time to align :) :

Mondays 5-6 pm at Om On Yoga (320 Libbie Ave) for Gentle
Mondays 6:30-7:45 pm at PYR (6517 Dickens Place) for Yin/Yang Yoga

Tuesdays 6:30-7:30 am at Om On Yoga for Sunrise Vinyasa
Tuesdays 12-1 pm at Om On Yoga for Slow Flow

Here are other classes at PYR that I wholeheartedly recommend (check the schedule for more events, for details, and to make sure nothing's cancelled due to events and workshops):

Tuesdays 6:45-8 pm Hatha Beginner/Intermediate with Cate

Wednesdays 6:30 and 7:30 pm Hoop Dance with Natalie

Thursdays 6:30-7:45 pm Community Yoga with J

Thursdays 6:45-8 pm Hatha for Beginners with Cate

Fridays 5:30-6:30 pm Energetic Flow with Jo

Sundays 4-5 pm Pay What You Can Gentle Yoga (taught by various instructors on a rotating basis)

Monday, October 24, 2011

Fall Food Frenzy

After about October 15, all my determination to cling vainly to summer begins to evaporate. By that time we're venturing into 40 degree weather at night and the humidity comes and goes intermittently until the air outside resembles the taste and texture of a Honeycrisp apple. Sharp, sweet and tangy. (?)

Anyway, I start doing the same strange things everyone else who nests a home probably does: buying pansies and chrysanthemums and decorative gourds (click that link only if you have a strong stomach for the f-word and a taste for the hilarious!) to put on my front porch.

Food-wise the purchasing shifts from cucumbers and watermelon to butternut and acorn squash, cauliflower for soup and mashing, and bread. Sometimes, when I have a craving for a certain ingredient but have no idea how to use it in an interesting way I will visit my favorite vegetarian website for fresh ideas.

I don't eat a lot of bread at all, because the remnants of the Adkins Diet debacle in the early 2000's are still hanging around in my consciousness... BUT being that I am much less restrictive these days (unless you count the whole vegetarian thing, of course) I like to eat it from time to time and especially during the Fall and Winter months. I can always put on a big sweater, right?

When I do buy bread I try to buy whole grain bread with a good chunky texture and a nice crust on it. If it has nuts or seeds or chunks of whole roasted garlic, even better. However, I usually am so sparing with it that I end up with essentially a big lava rock with a flat edge on my counter in a plastic bag. What to do?

Feeding the sweet wild birds in my yard is one option of course and sometimes I do that. Last night though, I got this overwhelming craving for stuffing. So I went in the kitchen and rattled off the ingredients one typically finds in stuffing. Bread, onions, celery, sage, parsley, celery seed, broth, olive oil or butter, salt and pepper and boxed vegetable broth. I also had some walnuts and dried cranberries, so I was good to go! I added some carrots that were hanging out getting ready to go limp. I got the husband into the preparation which was fun and made it go by really quickly.

Here's the breakdown for last night's Fall Cranberry Walnut Stuffing (of course you can play with the measurements as these are just by memory and the recipe made enough for 2-3 meals for two):

3/4 loaf stale whole wheat artisan bread
1 skinny carrot, peeled and diced into small pieces
2 celery ribs, diced into small pieces
1/2 medium red onion, diced into small pieces
3/4 tsp sage
3/4 tsp dried parsley
2 pinches celery seed
3-4 twists Himalayan pink salt (or sea salt is fine, of course)
3-4 twists black pepper
sprinkle of olive oil
2 tbsp Earth Balance Organic Buttery Spread
3/4 cup Imagine Foods Organic No-Chicken Broth
1/2 cup chopped walnuts
1/2 cup dried cranberries

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Spray or oil a medium sized baking dish.

Chop all the bread into about 1/2 inch cubes and set aside.
Put all diced vegetables with the spices, olive oil, 'butter,' and broth into a medium sauce pan and simmer until the veggies get slightly soft and everything blends well.

Right before baking, add the bread cubes a little at a time, tossing thoroughly so they are coated with seasonings and well blended with the vegetables. Then add the walnuts and cranberries. Spread it all out in the baking dish. Make sure the mixture is a little damp (not saturated) by adding a little more broth anywhere it looks too dry.

Bake for about 30-ish minutes uncovered. I like a slightly crusty top so I moved it up under the broiler turned on low for about 2 minutes right at the end.

I served it with my curried butternut squash-coconut soup (thanks Fresca restaurant for the inspiration-- I went home and copied your recipe as best I could and it's so perfect and easy, I keep coming back to it!):

I had a half a medium sized squash already baked (cut in half, seeds scooped out, 45 min at about 375 degrees, open face down in a baking dish with 1/2 inch water and covered in foil) so all I had to do was scoop it out and puree with about 3/4 can light organic coconut milk, a little more broth, and a little of the following spices: cayenne, curry, allspice, salt, pepper. Then I allowed it to simmer a bit so it would all blend well.

The combination of the two dishes together was awesome! The creamy-spicy-sweetness of the soup with the crusty bread and slightly crunchy fresh veggies and walnuts were a lovely combination. It's all I can do now not to go buy silly things like cornucopias and more decorative gourds for my dinner table. I'll leave that to the more Martha Stewart-ish of my friends :)

Enjoy and let me know if you vary the recipe and how it turns out!

Monday, August 1, 2011

This week's class schedule Aug 1-7

Hello friends!

Here is where to catch me this week for publicly available classes.

Monday
5:00 pm Gentle Yoga at Om On Yoga, 320 Libbie Ave
6:30 pm Restorative Yoga at Project Yoga Richmond, 6517 Dickens Place

Tuesday
6:30 am Sunrise Vinyasa Yoga at Om On Yoga
12:00 noon Slow Flow Yoga at Om On Yoga

Wednesday
10:00 am Free/Donation based Yoga In Monroe Park (on VCU Campus) (co-taught with Liz Sussan)

Thursday
6:30 am Sunrise Vinyasa Yoga at Om On Yoga

Can't wait to see you on the mat.

"I catch a glimpse of such peace when I can allow my body and my postures to be imperfect, when I can simply let things be as they are. In class I remind students that swimmers who fight against the water tire and drown. Those who relax into it float... On our mats we learn to float." ~Rolf Gates, Day 213, Meditations From the Mat